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linesman
25-01-2006, 21:58
O.k. it's estimated at 100,000,000 quid this week (can't do the pound sign ż)

what would you do with it ?

Me

sort out the family with enough money so that they could live happily everafter

10 million to each of the 2 local main hospitals

10 million to each of the 2 schools my kids go to

(not that they'd be going there for much longer !)

A fabulous home in the sun

As many cars boats etc. as I wanted

Rell the bosses where to stick their job ,after I have received the cheque of course

made sure all my good mates in work no longer had a mortgage or loan to pay off

And finally 85p to the wife,

Her bus fare back home :D :D

linesman
25-01-2006, 22:00
>>Rell the bosses

oops should say Tell the bosses

--deleted--
25-01-2006, 22:15
>And finally 85p to the wife,

>Her bus fare back home

:O
linesman...........back home from where??

Has she left you???
:D

gill
25-01-2006, 22:20
Lovely, Linesman.

I'd most of that except the wife thing (you rotter) and the school (no kids).

I'd also be an employer. The 2,000 quid a day interest would be more than enough to pay for:

Gardener
Cook
Chauffeur
Cleaner

... and give me plenty of time to SHOP with the rest of the interest! :D

Gill :)

beebs
26-01-2006, 01:22
Linesman

I'd buy a football club, as yer do. Say, Man U', then have our garden wall fixed as its been getting me down as I never touched it. It was already wobbly. Then I'd send the family on a round the world tour and put my feet up on the table and eat cereals from a large bowl.
Then i'd make a whopping big donation to a well-known leading party.... thats in power;-)and it will keep them and Man U at the top, while I watch the bloody telly and climb over our front wall, (newly repaired!) in peace!!!!

beebsB-)

john.broadbent
26-01-2006, 16:41
>>put my feet up on the table and eat cereals from a large bowl.
>>

Easily pleased then Beebs?
:)

What always amazes me is, the fairly large number of people who win huge amounts saying
"It won't change me".
Yeah, OK!
:D

anonymous
26-01-2006, 16:48
Chance to dream, dont normally do it but got a ticket today.
Dream on

anonymous
26-01-2006, 17:58
I haven't won any large amounts, the odd 100 on Ernie, but did get a legacy of 90,000 quids. Yes it did change my life, I was able to do all those things I have always promised myself. Decent holiday for the past 5 years being the ost enjoyable, and a secure retirement. Well for a couple more years anyway..:D :D

Why don't we get a pound sign now?

jal jal
26-01-2006, 18:14
Hi Ralph & Everybody :)
The most I`ve won is ż1,000 on Ernie but will play the lottery tomorrow
Let you know if I win :^O :^O
jal

petersmyth1
26-01-2006, 18:25
>Why don't we get a pound sign now?

Ralph

That's a good question?

I only noticed it for the 1st time yesterday. The pound sign types as a pound sign but in the preview comes out as a question mark.

Has anyone told Max yet? I was going to but it might distract them from fixing the email alerts. :^O

Some twit in the office has set our forum language as English(US) I read somewhere that is what your keyboard prints if it is set to English(US)

Peter

accordion
26-01-2006, 18:57
????????

The new VNU pound signs!

Dave

anonymous
26-01-2006, 19:24
Maybe Max is American and has set us to the wrong side of the pond.:D

--deleted--
26-01-2006, 19:46
My keyboard was US English and my @ was "

It was easily changed,

Thankyou to my son :D

Glenda

bob.gas
26-01-2006, 20:18
Linesman,

What would you do about the begging letters?


Would you still send them? :D

Bob

anonymous
26-01-2006, 20:42
>made sure all my good mates in work no longer had a mortgage or loan to pay off

linesman

surely this generosity is extended to forum mates?:|:D

Though its a mind blowing amount to win. Its probably enough to give most people heart failure. Oh well, ive got my numbers and im ready to go:D

A linesman mate:^O

gill
26-01-2006, 21:10
Peter

> I only noticed it for the 1st time yesterday. The pound sign types as a pound sign but in the preview comes out as a question mark.

> Has anyone told Max yet?

I reported it a few days ago, but as always feel like I'm wasting my time. :(

As for Max, I think his e-mail address is no longer active. I got a daily "undeliverable" message back for 72 hours, then finally got a message saying it had given up trying! :^O

Gill :)

linesman
26-01-2006, 22:05
>>surely this generosity is extended to forum mates

Of course it is :D

I'll let you know if I win , from sunnier places of course ]:)

accordion
26-01-2006, 22:16
Linesman, I'll protect you from these beggars. Send me your address and I'll be there in a jiffy!

Dave [making pals with Linesman]

nik
26-01-2006, 22:33
If I won a 100,000,000 quid, I guess I would spend some on wine, some on wimmin, and some on song. The rest would be wasted.
Perhaps the pound sign has gone because we should be Euros by now.

NikB-)

gill
26-01-2006, 23:11
> Perhaps the pound sign has gone because we should be Euros by now.

Ouch! Wash your mouth out, Nik. :p

Gill :)

anonymous
26-01-2006, 23:22
> Linesman, I'll protect you from these beggars. Send
> me your address and I'll be there in a jiffy!
>
> Dave [making pals with Linesman]


Dave, get in the queue:D

Col [linesmans real mate]:^O

beebs
26-01-2006, 23:30
Canson, theres always a chance you might win. Thats how it works in a democracy:-)

petersmyth1
27-01-2006, 00:14
> Canson, theres always a chance you might win. Thats
> how it works in a democracy:-)

Not too many Isrealis are going down that line at the moment.

Peter, being political without the sarcastic icon.

accordion
27-01-2006, 07:32
>
> Dave, get in the queue:D
>
> Col [linesmans real mate]:^O

Col,
I asked first, clear off.

Dave [like family with Linesman] :D

linesman
27-01-2006, 18:25
>> Dave, get in the queue
>
> Col [linesmans real mate]

Col,
I asked first, clear off.

Dave [like family with Linesman]

Never knew I had so many mates :D

or such a big family :D

anne morgan
27-01-2006, 18:31
> >> Dave, get in the queue
> >
> > Col [linesmans real mate]
>
> Col,
> I asked first, clear off.
>
> Dave [like family with Linesman]
>
> Never knew I had so many mates :D

And God knows what it will be like if you actually win:D
>
> or such a big family :D

anonymous
27-01-2006, 20:29
> > >> Dave, get in the queue
> > >
> > > Col [linesmans real mate]
> >
> > Col,
> > I asked first, clear off.
> >
> > Dave [like family with Linesman]

Col:^O:^O

> > Never knew I had so many mates :D
>
> And God knows what it will be like if you actually
> win:D
> >
> > or such a big family :D
>

Linesman, have you noticed how soon people are trying to get on the bandwagon?:|

Col [lost (now found again) twin]:^O:^O

linesman
27-01-2006, 20:42
>>Linesman, have you noticed how soon people are trying to get on the bandwagon

I haven't won it yet and the begging letters have started :D

gill
27-01-2006, 21:46
> I haven't won it yet

An optimist, eh? You must be a "glass is half full" sort of guy. ;)

Do you need a financial advisor? :D

Gill :)

linesman
27-01-2006, 21:48
>>Do you need a financial advisor?

you'll be the first to know if I do :D

anonymous
27-01-2006, 22:10
It goes by seniority so all those over 62 are first in the queue at Linesman's front door. So make way for a 63 year old.... :D :D

accordion
27-01-2006, 23:01
>
> Linesman, have you noticed how soon people are trying
> to get on the bandwagon?:|
>
> Col [lost (now found again) twin]:^O:^O

You little liar Col! :^O

Stick with me Linesman, I'll act as your secretary and shield you from the begging letters. Heck, I'll even work for free on Saturdays. You can pay me half the interest on a daily rate - and you can keep the cash.

See? Not even begging.

Dave [not a sponger] :^O

jal jal
27-01-2006, 23:11
Hi Ralph :)
Get ye behind me your only a young one at 63
:^O :^O
Peter`s no chance if he`s only 60 ;)
jal

anonymous
27-01-2006, 23:18
> Stick with me Linesman, I'll act as your secretary
> and shield you from the begging letters. Heck, I'll
> even work for free on Saturdays. You can pay me half
> the interest on a daily rate - and you can keep the
> cash.
>
> See? Not even begging.
>
> Dave [not a sponger] :^O

PSsst! Its been drawn! .... Rollover:_|:_|

Dave

yer barking up the wrong tree. I think linesman must have been using us to get more mates:D:^O

The worlds biggest lottery is still at large. What do yer think, linesman?:| [not burning any bridges]:D

Col:^O:^O

linesman
27-01-2006, 23:26
Oh well ,let's try again next week

wonder how many more long lost relative's appear ;-)

good fun seeing the banter here isn't it :D

--deleted--
27-01-2006, 23:40
Hi there linesman,

Remember me, your long lost ex ;-)

Glenda :^O

accordion
28-01-2006, 10:08
Col,

We should join forces. See you at Linesman's place for family tea tomorrow afternoon?

We can help choose the winning numbers and plan how to divvy the cash.

Dave [related to Col now, as well as Linesman] :^O

PS - I see that Glenda is trying to muscle in - but ex-girls don't count!

anonymous
28-01-2006, 10:48
You lot are gonna be sorry when you realise that I'm going to win it :D

Steph.

anonymous
28-01-2006, 10:58
Steph,

Why spend a Quid, when you can fabricate a long lost relationship :p and have a share of their winnings..

And be another ż1 better off too........

Oh, Linesman.........cooo eeeeee!!!!

Remember me??? ;-)

Pixie, :x

petersmyth1
28-01-2006, 11:33
> Peter`s no chance if he`s only 60 ;)

jal

Get thee behind me Satan

For Christ's sake I'm not yet 60, well not until 27 days have passed, so wash your mouth out and ask for absolution before buying my birthday card. :^O

Peter

jal jal
28-01-2006, 13:03
Hi Peter :)
Just breaking you in gradually to the sound of the BIG 60. Just a thought will there be time to read cards while entertaining the Ladies ;) :D
Absolution is that with or without Custard :^O :^:
jal

anne r
28-01-2006, 22:27
>>I haven't won any large amounts, the odd 100 on Ernie, but did get a legacy of 90,000 quids.

Well Helloooooooo Ralph ;) You never did say, but are you married by any chance :D :D



Only joking Ralph.
I've got my eye on Peter's millions ;)
(Don't tell anyone, but he's realy Stringfellow).

:^O

anonymous
28-01-2006, 22:49
> Col,

> We should join forces. See you at Linesman's place
> for family tea tomorrow afternoon?
>
> Dave [related to Col now, as well as Linesman] :^O
>
> PS - I see that Glenda is trying to muscle in - but
> ex-girls don't count!

Dave

Very devious. If I read you right, your suggesting the 'dynamic duo' like Batman and RobinB-)
Maybe Glenda could fill in as, Catwoman:D
As the programme used to say .... "Same time! Same place! (next week)

Col:^O a part of the dynamic duo[not dressed up like Rodney and Delboy]

nik
28-01-2006, 23:05
>>>Ouch! Wash your mouth out, Nik.
Gill
Honest truth. I have two wallets. One without Pounds Sterling in it, and one without Euros in it. Wherever I am I have to turn to my dear wife and say "Sorry Darling, but you will have to settle the bill, I don't have a bean on me.":D:D
NikB-)

gill
28-01-2006, 23:16
> "Sorry Darling, but you will have to settle the bill, I don't have a bean on me."

Do you still use beans where you are then? ;\

Gill :)

accordion
29-01-2006, 00:19
>>Dave

>>Very devious. If I read you right, >>your suggesting the 'dynamic duo' like >>Batman and Robin
>>Maybe Glenda could fill in as, Catwoman
>>As the programme used to say .... "Same time! Same place! (next week)

>>Col a part of the dynamic duo[not dressed up like Rodney and Delboy]

Col,

How could you say that? I'm not devious. We are family now and must make sure our inheritance isn't squandered by brother Linesman. Let's face it, he screwed up by picking the wrong numbers this week. He needs us!

Catwoman Glenda can take over my original role as secretary and deal with the begging letters.

Dave [honest as the day is long, and truly family to Lottery winners]

petersmyth1
29-01-2006, 01:00
> Catwoman Glenda can take over my original role as
> secretary and deal with the begging letters.

Dave

I think you are assuming, wrongly, that Glenda isn't sending the begging letters. I won 10 pounds on the lottery last weekend and emailed Glenda to tell her. Thunderbird after the 1st one blocked her all requests for a sub. I never thought Thunderbird could block so many emails over 24 hrs. :^O

Peter

--deleted--
29-01-2006, 10:51
X-(

I'm busy at the moment but...........

Watch this space...

Miaowwwwww!!!!!!!

http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:oIz-T_1y-hxarM:www.catwomanslair.com/images/template/catwoman_r2_c1.jpg

anonymous
29-01-2006, 15:17
>>>I'm busy at the moment but...........

Pssst! so am IB-)
holy cow batman! [er, Dave]

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00004U3OE.01._SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg

anne r
29-01-2006, 16:24
Awwww, bless you look lovely Col ;)

--deleted--
29-01-2006, 17:44
Right now Peter, :p

I have time to respond,
You promised me that our erotic emails would remain a secret.:8}

I must plead..

actus non facit reum nisi mens sit rea,

I actually wanted a share of your lucky windfall, to help my old Granny to set up her own business in the red light district of Belfast, (Do they have one??)?:|
Since you declined help, I have decided to turn to my long lost ex..... :x
linesman,
Actually he seems a much better proposition :O, as his much BIGGER ;-) impending triumph, will go a long way to keeping me in the luxuries to which I have become accustomed. :D
If you promise not to let THIS Cat (woman) out of the bag.;-)
I will remain your
""Bit on the side" but you must pledge not to tell, or my attempts at extortion........ errr I mean sharing equally,;\may lead to nothing.

Batman and Robin are off somewhere fighting for the good of Gotham City,
Look out for the Riddler, and the Joker...
if you see them run for your life..........
Till later "BIG BOY!!" ;-)

Glenda

accordion
30-01-2006, 07:38
Col,

Forget the comic book stuff - stay focussed.

http://www.pbusa.org/oldsite/graphics/mar05money.jpg

Dave :D

anonymous
30-01-2006, 15:38
:^O:^O:^O:^O

nik
30-01-2006, 18:58
>>>Do you still use beans where you are then?

Gill, but of course. Its remembering how many make five thats the problem:D
Have you noticed how the lottery peeps keep interrupting our conversation, and as for that Glenda and Peter, I have to wade thro pages to find you.]:)

NikB-)

gill
30-01-2006, 19:38
> Its remembering how many make five thats the problem

Ah, now that's something I'll never forget. My dear old dad taught me that when I was younger than I can remember!

Two beans, a bean and a half, half a bean, and a bean :D

It's been passed on through the generations and still going strong! :^O

Gill :)

nik
31-01-2006, 23:03
>>>Two beans, a bean and a half, half a bean, and a bean.
Gill
How could I forget, and I have been falling down stairs in Cambridge recently as well. I never did like those old vases anyway.

NikB-)

linesman
03-02-2006, 18:48
ż125,000,000

maybe tonight's the night ?

:D

anonymous
03-02-2006, 19:08
You got the same numbers as me then?

linesman
03-02-2006, 20:49
hope not :D

but, if I have I don't mind sharing as long as it's only us two :D

jal jal
03-02-2006, 21:57
Hi Linesman :)
I know it`s not the right Forum but have you got CA`s EZ Antivirus on your comp.:)
jal

linesman
03-02-2006, 22:11
Hi jal jal

No I haven't I use avg

But I see you can get a years free trial for ez

http://www.my-etrust.com/microsoft/

will ave to have a dig around to see what it's like

Avg throws a wobbly with e mail scanning occasionaly ,and updates can go awol

Are you trying ez?

linesman
03-02-2006, 22:19
downloading as we speak as they say

won't install yet until I have a look at any reviews

anne r
03-02-2006, 22:27
>> EZ antivirus (eTrust)

Hi jal jal and Linesman, just noticed you 2 discussing EZ, perhaps you should take a look at this thread first:
http://forums.computeractive.co.uk/thread.jsp?forum=10&thread=76217&start=30&msRange=15

Let me know your thoughts ?:|

jal jal
03-02-2006, 22:27
Hi Linesman :)
I`ve already got it but it went off yesterday & it said it was out of date but it had still 2yrs to run so I uninstalled it using the EZ AV uninstall then I re-installed with the CD provided but it never came back so I E-mailed CA EZ-Av & they said it was down to a Fatal Error 303 or something like that & would send a Patch which they did & it`s up & working again except the RealTime bit that sits on the Taskbar so that you can run the scan & update the AV & quarantine things etc.
I just thought you might know how to get it back on the Taskbar if you had got it
Sorry for the long winded details
Cheers :)
jal

linesman
03-02-2006, 22:38
>>Let me know your thoughts

thanks for the warning anne r

just deleted the download

I have a look at most freebies

I tend to download ,then go looking

will have to start doing it the other way around :D

from what I have googled ,it doesn't seem too clever !

hope it goes ok for you jal jal

gill
03-02-2006, 22:39
Anne,

I think I'm gonna cry!!!!! :_| :_|

:^O

jal jal
03-02-2006, 22:52
Hi Anne :)
I find CA EZAV & Firewall & PestPatrol to be very good & I deleted it without any problem.
If you send your problem where it says web support free they might help you

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jal

gill
03-02-2006, 22:58
Jal, we've tried it all and NOTHING will get rid of it. I'm in tears with pure frustration. :_| :_|

jal jal
03-02-2006, 23:05
Hi Everybody :)
Sorry about that it wasn`t meant to happen try again. :8}
Type in Google search CA Home and Home Office Store.
Click on 4th one down
Then click on Product Support & Service
Then click on EZ Antivirus Technical Support
Then on Web Support Free
Got there in the end hope this helps
Cheers :)
jal

anne r
03-02-2006, 23:06
Actually, from what I've read on EZ it gets good reviews, but these are users that have knowingly installed it!
God knows what's going on with poor Anndims situation ?:|

I wonder if a worm could cause this?

Gill,
I have a headache! :_|

jal jal
03-02-2006, 23:08
Hi Gill :)
Don`t be in tears my love your making me fill up :_|:_| :_|
jal :x

anonymous
03-02-2006, 23:18
:^O:^Ojal youre a natural:^O

gill
03-02-2006, 23:19
Here's another one:

http://forums.computeractive.co.uk/thread.jsp?forum=10&thread=78447&start=0&msRange=15#534821

:_| :_| :_|

petersmyth1
03-02-2006, 23:54
> :^O:^Ojal youre a natural:^O

I agree. A natural dickhead :D

Only a dickhead would introduce a PC problem in the Off Topic forum. If it was a newbie excuses could be accepted but Jal you should know better. I don't want any excuses Jal just accept you're completely non compos mentis. ]:)

Peter

gill
04-02-2006, 00:17
You don't have to be so crude and rude, Peter. :D

Jal, Peter's under the impression that you need his permission before posting anything on this forum. ]:)

(Think) What a prat! :D

Gill :)

jal jal
04-02-2006, 00:26
Hi Peter :)
I put in here because I new Linesman had got CA PestPatrol but I did say it was the wrong forum. I admit to failure
But as your practically 60 I suppose I can over look your cutting remarks while I have my Horlicks to calm my nerves :^O :^O
cheers
jal (Reprimanded) :_| :_|

anonymous
04-02-2006, 00:30
Gill...
would you take a bullet for me darling?


mom

petersmyth1
04-02-2006, 00:40
Gill

Of course I want d/heads to ask for permission to post daft questions here. I don't have to make a decision I just paste this forums stickys. :D

>>Two requests:

>>1) Please choose one of our other forums to ask for computing advice or discuss IT stories.
>>2) Please keep the discussion constructive – we only delete posts if we feel we have to so don’t force us to do it.>>

Gill do I need to paste anything more? :^O

Peter

gill
04-02-2006, 00:46
:O Oh my God!!!! Peter, you're transmorphing into JR. ARGGHHHH.

Gill :)

petersmyth1
04-02-2006, 01:01
Gill

How dare you :x

For Christ's sake it was only a few lines and I've never pasted it before. I haven't saved it in Word for future pastings and I'm still here:D

Peter

gill
04-02-2006, 01:23
Gotcha! :^O :^O :^O

Where's Noel Edmunds? He was here a minute ago!

Noel.... Cooeee, Noel... where are you? That's not the Gotcha, that's the Blobby!

Sorry, Peter, you can't trust anyone these days. Noel.... put that down!!!!!

petersmyth1
04-02-2006, 01:43
Gill

Now I have you where I want you.

Deal or no deal ]:)

Peter

gill
04-02-2006, 02:36
No deal, Peter. What I said about SP2 still stands!

Gill :)

accordion
04-02-2006, 09:32
I notice here that inane banter is fine when it suits. Strange how it warrants sniping comments if it's between other people.

Dave

gill
04-02-2006, 11:27
Sorry, I thought it was allowed in the OTF. There was no-one else around at 2.30 am and I was lonely. :_|

Gill :)

accordion
04-02-2006, 12:59
> Sorry, I thought it was allowed in the OTF. There
> was no-one else around at 2.30 am and I was lonely.
> :_|
>
> Gill :)

I shall quote you on that Gill.

Dave :D

petersmyth1
04-02-2006, 13:14
Dave

It was the bantering to me that Gill was talking about not the filthy leecherous interpretation of her comments you arrived at. :^O

Peter

accordion
04-02-2006, 15:55
> Dave
>
> It was the bantering to me that Gill was talking
> about not the filthy leecherous interpretation of her
> comments you arrived at. :^O
>
> Peter


Don't flatter yourself there Peter. Contextually she was replying to my comment.

Filthy, lecherous??? Whatever gave you that idea?

Dave